Ch Ch Ch Ch Changes...

Well only 4 months this time... getting better.

Wow! This past month has been a roller coaster. But since its been awhile I should give a little background.

Money has become desperately tight for me. I had managed along pretty well even without the extra cash I was getting from working on the race cars. But gradually I had been noticing that I was getting to the last week of the month and had no money left. I managed to scrape by but its been becoming worse and worse as prices rise and my income doesn't. It finally got to the point I didn't even have money for the phone anymore which greatly distressed my ex since I'm still on her account. I had sent her messages telling her that I had no idea when I would be able to send anything and that if she had to she could shut off my service.

Then I got a message from her son. Big trouble, shes in jail and hes in foster care. The phones were working long enough for me to talk to him a couple of times and send some messages but then a few days later they were off.

I am not sure what the hell happened to my ex. Something has changed in her and not for the better. I don't know what she was locked up for but I was told that she could be facing serious jail time. There have been several incidents that have revolved around her involving the police that I was told about recently, one involving the SWAT team! I hate to think of all the trauma her son has been through. Thankfully Grandma is picking John up so he and his sister will be together again. I hope to see them both the next time I'm in Southern California.

As for me I am trying to get healthier. I have started replacing one meal a day with a whole food smoothie. I'm just winging it on the recipes but they are usually 1-2 fruits + 1-2 vegetables + greens like kale, collards, beet or even spinach, put them in a blender with a couple of ice cubes and bingo! Grass clippings in apple sauce!! Ok, now what it lacks in deliciousness it more than makes up for in nutrition. I can feel a definite energy boost after I have it and its got the plumbing running at full capacity. Now I just need to keep my head in the game on this and not let temptation ruin it.

My prosthetic has become problematic again after almost of month of no issues. I am still getting irritation and rubbing in the inside of my knee but if I stay off it for a few days everything settles down. Can't wait for them to make a new one, just waiting on approval now.

Well I guess that brings us up to date!

Wow, I did it again...

Now its been over 2 years since I last posted here. So much has happened I don't know where to begin.

A few months after my last post Christine and I broke up. I didn't see it coming... I was so wrapped up with the loss of the leg I wasn't paying attention to what was important and the resentments she had built up has cause her to become distant. As I tried to reach out to her she withdrew more and finally let me know how she felt.

Leaving was very hard on me. I still miss the kids a lot, but I did get a visit with both of them a few days before Christmas year before last and I saw Breanna down in Southern California for lunch while she was with her Grandma. I am hoping I can get down to visit Johnnie sometime soon.

I moved up to Sonoma County, Rohnert Park specifically, and got back into working on race cars part time. It felt good to get up and be physical but my limitations became apparent very quickly. I started having problems with my left foot almost immediately. I would go on a race trip, get a blister and spend months healing up... or more accurately not healing up and eventually losing my big toe to an infection. After the next trip it was the same thing on the next toe, then the third but we managed to heal it. All it took was a customized shoe and sitting on my ass for 6 months.

So where am I now? The current battle is with a couple of pressure sores on the back of my knee on the stump leg. I have a new prosthetic leg (its tie-dye and looks awesome!) but I have started to have issues with it. I am hoping to get the bugs worked out and heal up so I can seriously work on losing weight. My left knee has arthritis and inflammation around the kneecap which have been causing me lots of pain. More exercise will help that too. I am also finally seeing a therapist to help me put perspective on my situation and find some happiness.

As far as work goes I am still technically unemployed but I am working on some projects. My Dad wrote a cookbook and developed some spice rubs for pellet grilling. I built his website http://www.unclebobssmokinhotbbq.com and will continue to help him try and grow his business. It's been very rewarding in so many ways, unfortunately not financially... yet!

I am going to try and post more... seriously :)

Happy New Year

Well this last month of 2008 has been one for the books. My foot wound continued its trek through November. A week before Thanksgiving the reason for the delay in MRI approval was discovered... they had been sending the requests through the wrong insurance provider... even after I had made it known on more than one occasion to more than one individual that I was on Medi-Care, not Medi-Cal. After the snafu was exposed I was in 2 days later getting the scan done. Then it was wait for another week until I would see my doctor again. We had a nice Thanksgiving but I started feeling ill the Saturday after and it seemed to get worse as the days passed to my appointment. When I went to the appointment they got me in fast and gave me the bad news... osteo mylitus... a bone infection. It was bad enough that I would need to undergo 2 surgeries, the first to remove the worst part of the infection (what was left of my right foot) at which point they would leave the end of my leg open and packed with gauze for up to a week while pumping me full of IV antibiotics to kill whatever infection lingered and allow for the bad stuff to drain out. Then they would do the second surgery to make it into a stump that would be capable of using a prosthetic in the future. It all happened in about two weeks time and I couldn't wait to get home.
Once I got home the reality of all this began to set in. Everything is harder when you only have one leg.

Has it been over a year?

I didn't realize it had been so long since I posted anything here. I guess a personal update is in order.

I moved to Santa Clara with my family (GF Christine and the kids, Breanna and John) to a 3br house from our 2br apartment in August. The change in attitudes was almost instantaneous. We are all much happier here. We are paying more now but we get so much for the extra money that its actually cheaper in the long run to live here. We are closer to Christines office so her commute was cut in half, and the kids schools are convienient for her to pick them up as well. She has also started heavy use of coupons and ad checking before grocery shopping and it has resulted in big savings for us. I will write more about the house at a later time.

As for my medical issues, the diabetes control is up and down these days. I am being treated at specialized clinic and they have been changing my regim a lot. It seems like im always chasing the numbers lately. But that could also be related to a foot wound I am battling at the moment as well.

I have had an open wound in the bottom of my foot for going on 10 weeks. On the outside its a small deep hole (I say small but its about 3/8" across) and inside it opens up to a large cavity that basically goes to the bone. I am being seen weekly at the wound care clinic but its not getting smaller. I have been waiting this whole time for approval for an MRI so we can move forward with either corrective surgery to attempt to save the foot or a below knee amputation which will put me out of commision for close to 9 months but in the end may be the better solution. It's been 4+ years of complications and I have living to do!!

I have made so many t-shirt designs in the last year that I don't know where to start... I guess I'll save them for another post.

idiot magnet

What more need be said...

This design was actually inspired by a trip to the Monterey Bay Aquarium. Everywhere we went people were running into my wheelchair, or not looking and walking and standing right in front of me as I tried to view the tanks. The capper was when we left and decided to go to Bubba Gump's for some food before we went home. They were doing construction work and had a covered walkway set up for the safety of pedestrians. It was easily wide enough for people to pass in either direction. This little girl jumped across in front of us and plastered herself against the wall on our side of the walkway just in time for Christine to run over her feet with my wheelchair with me in it... and we just kept going and shaking our heads. "This thing is a freaking idiot magnet!" Christine said later, and a classic was born!

What can brown do for you?

Yeah, I had to go there.

iPoor - the anti iPod

I have actually seen another shirt that was called "iPoor" but I thought the design was lame. It had iPod control buttons and what is supposed to be earbud cords running up to either side of the neck. My GF actually planted the seed on this one. And after I checked and found out that yes they do indeed still sell portable cassette players it was on...